http://www.itv.com/news/meridian/2012-04-29/wettest-drought-on-record/

If it's a bit parched where you are we could hire you a Caroline Spelman for a small fee

All this lady has do is go on TV and utter the word "Drought" with a straight face and within hours nay minutes the heavens will open until you are inundated with the stuff up to your ankles.

Native American's can't hold a candle to this woman with their dancing. The Chinese try silver iodide seeding their clouds without any accuracy or guarantee.

What everyone needs is a Caroline Spelman the UK's Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs. Even more reliable than the Gore Effect

Who's up for sending her to Texas this Summer?--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Good Idea

In 2009, during the expenses crisis it was reported that Spelman had received £40,000 for cleaning and bills for her constituency home; this was despite her husband claiming it was their main home. In 2008 she reportedly over-claimed hundreds of pounds towards her council tax.[4]
"Nannygate" controversy

On 6 June 2008, Spelman was the subject of controversy when it was suggested that for around twelve months from May 1997 she paid her child's nanny, Tina Haynes, from her parliamentary staffing allowance, contrary to the rule governing such allowances and fears of the misuse of them. Spelman claims that her nanny also acted as her constituency secretary and was paid from the public taxpayers' purse for this aspect of her further employment. Haynes confirms that occasionally she would answer phone calls and post documents but initially she denied such happenings when interviewed on BBC Two's Newsnight via telephone. The accusations came at a time when Conservative Party leader David Cameron had tasked Spelman with reviewing the use of parliamentary allowances by Conservative MPs and MEPs in the wake of the Derek Conway affair.[5] The allegation against Spelman came shortly after two Conservative MEPs, Giles Chichester (Leader of the Conservatives in the EU Parliament) and Den Dover (Conservative Chief Whip in the EU Parliament), were forced to resign amid claims they misused their parliamentary allowances. However, Spelman was not urged to resign by party leader, David Cameron. She referred the matter pertaining to herself, her nanny and parliamentary funds to John Lyon, the Parliamentary Commissioner for Standards.[6] Senior Conservative colleagues including former Shadow Home Secretary David Davis stated their support for Spelman.[7]

New revelations were exposed on the BBC's Newsnight programme that nine years previously Mrs Spelman's secretary, Sally Hammond, complained to the Conservative Party leadership that she was using Parliamentary allowances to pay her nanny and that the arrangement with the nanny was over a two year period and not one. [8]

In March 2009, the Commons Standards and Privileges Committee ruled Mrs Spelman had misused her allowances to pay for nannying work in 1997 and 1998.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caroline_Spelman