I thought I'd better post this here and not risk offending anyone who might be sensitve. My family (on my insistence) has decided not to exchange gifts at all this year. I may not even send Christmas cards. Maybe I'll send something out in January, but I'm not putting any pressure on myself to meet false expectations. We are going to spend time with each other and with friends. We'll visit some museums, go to a movie or two, play some games, etc. during the season. Of course, we'll spend time focusing on celebrating the birth of our Savior, but without the trappings.
It has been such a freeing experience! No worries about what to get anybody and whether they will like it and whether I'll ever hear if they got it. (my nieces and nephews rarely acknowledge gifts). Also, no guilt about not liking something I've received. No woriries in the future about putting something that was a gift in a yard sale. That is actually where the idea for no gifts this year got its start. We did a yard sale this year--first one in 8 years--and I got so discouraged/angry/frustrated with all the crap I've saved because it was a gift and I couldn't deal with the guilt of getting rid of it.
So, how about you? Cutting back this year?
Check out this website www.buynothingforchristmas.org
Cutting back, perhaps. Cutting out, never. We've always purchased or made meaningful gifts for one anotherrather than tried to keep up with the norm or the neighbors or trends. We don't have enough to start with to consider much of anything junk and when the kids outgre their toys or clothes we donated them to the local homeless shelters.
If we tried to skip Christmas we'd end up like the Kranks.
If we tried to skip Christmas we'd end up like the Kranks.
We don't have a lot, either and I never have spent much at Christmas. I enjoy giving gifts and do so throughout the year when I find something someone would really like or find funny or use or whatever.
What is nice is not feeling the obligation to give. I've never been a very good recipient of gifts, I guess I feeling undeserving. I know that doesn't really express how I truly feel but I can't think of how to put it.
Oh, we did do some shoeboxes for Operation Christmas Child and are helping with holiday meal deliveries. I've been at the receiving end of "charity" so I enjoy spending time in give back. Someone is always less fortunate than I am. God always provides.
What is nice is not feeling the obligation to give. I've never been a very good recipient of gifts, I guess I feeling undeserving. I know that doesn't really express how I truly feel but I can't think of how to put it.
Oh, we did do some shoeboxes for Operation Christmas Child and are helping with holiday meal deliveries. I've been at the receiving end of "charity" so I enjoy spending time in give back. Someone is always less fortunate than I am. God always provides.
I truly enjoy sending & receiving Christmas cards ... I developed a routine with them - I take a family pic on Thanksgiving then order photo cards & send them out the first week in Dec ... I am on track to do that as I just updated my address list yesterday.
On both sides of our families we only exchange gifts for the kiddos - so that cut back a lot a few years ago. This year my brother is pretty strained so I told him it was their call on the amount or not to spend at all (they usually spend $50 on my DS & I spend $25 each on his two kiddos) ... if they cannot afford it then we can just enjoy Christmas dinner, not a big deal to us.
We have all of our Christmas presents wrapped & ready for DS - though his one from Santa is on it's way ... My DH & DS bought most of mine already & My DH is trying to decide on a pair of boots ... so there really isn't much in the way of stress - now just waiting for the BIG DAY at our house!
Sounds like you & your family have found something that will help you enjoy the holidays more and that is what is important!
On both sides of our families we only exchange gifts for the kiddos - so that cut back a lot a few years ago. This year my brother is pretty strained so I told him it was their call on the amount or not to spend at all (they usually spend $50 on my DS & I spend $25 each on his two kiddos) ... if they cannot afford it then we can just enjoy Christmas dinner, not a big deal to us.
We have all of our Christmas presents wrapped & ready for DS - though his one from Santa is on it's way ... My DH & DS bought most of mine already & My DH is trying to decide on a pair of boots ... so there really isn't much in the way of stress - now just waiting for the BIG DAY at our house!
Sounds like you & your family have found something that will help you enjoy the holidays more and that is what is important!
I could never cut out Christmas entirely because I love giving gifts! But, I do like the idea of a stress-free holiday, and I think it's wonderful that you're going to spend the time and energy doing things with the people you love most!! Kudos to you for doing this!
Em
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Well, I haven't sent cards for years and years. That is money that I use to fund Santa helper causes. I guess at how many cards I might send, multiply by $2 and figure that is the minimum I spend for donations for the needy.
(So - if you're wondering where you're card is, folks, some kid is enjoying a gift because you didn't get your card from me!)
I do gifts for my kids and now my grandchild. I also do one for a name exchange here at work. But otherwise, that's it.
Bud and I do not exchange gifts. We haven't for years. We buy gifts for each other as we wish. WE take trips.
IT's not as if you have little kids who will be disappointed, Trina.
But you may want to consider amending the NO GIFT rule. Instead, talk about a gift certificate for doing something for someone.
Someone on this board (or was it another?) said that all she wanted for Christmas was for her husband to empty the dishwasher on Saturday mornings. That was it. Nothing more than that.
You could give a gift certificate to do someone's chores for a day. Run an errand that someone really hates to do. Give a doing gift rather than a having gift.
But whatever you decide - enjoy!
(So - if you're wondering where you're card is, folks, some kid is enjoying a gift because you didn't get your card from me!)
I do gifts for my kids and now my grandchild. I also do one for a name exchange here at work. But otherwise, that's it.
Bud and I do not exchange gifts. We haven't for years. We buy gifts for each other as we wish. WE take trips.
IT's not as if you have little kids who will be disappointed, Trina.
But you may want to consider amending the NO GIFT rule. Instead, talk about a gift certificate for doing something for someone.
Someone on this board (or was it another?) said that all she wanted for Christmas was for her husband to empty the dishwasher on Saturday mornings. That was it. Nothing more than that.
You could give a gift certificate to do someone's chores for a day. Run an errand that someone really hates to do. Give a doing gift rather than a having gift.
But whatever you decide - enjoy!
Queen Mum - Grammy to Princess Bump (Lisa Giann) and Princess Bean (Gia Bella)
Great idea, Gloria. Keep in mind, though, that I have 3 guys who have trouble with this sort of thing. I'd love it if the twins gave each other the gift of not slamming each other for a day, maybe two.
There is no law that says one must give gifts at Christmas. It is more of a modern thing anyhow. I have several sisters in law that have decided not to "exchange" gifts starting this year. Fine but that doesnt mean I am not giving them little gifts like I always have. I dont believe that exchanging gifts is the point of the season. I enjoy shopping for little gifts (or making them sometimes) for my family, inlaws included, and a few friends. I love making and sending cards and receiving them too but if I dont get one from any particular person, I am not offended.
We each should celebrate (or not) Christmas in our own way, with our own traditions even if they are new ones starting this year. Just as long as we know and remember the "reason for the season", it will all be fine.
We each should celebrate (or not) Christmas in our own way, with our own traditions even if they are new ones starting this year. Just as long as we know and remember the "reason for the season", it will all be fine.
Charleneanne https://sbing.com/i/gallery2/481754-700.jpg
It's not a bad idea...but I think my girls would object. We stick to under $75 total for each girl. We're closeon Emily this year, but not over if I'm figuring correct. Many of their gifts came from garage sales or goodwill.
We don't exchange with any adults and only do smaller things for the grandparents from the girls. The girls each shop for mom and dad, but again it's not much.
We try to put more of the focus on Jesus - even making a cake on Christmas Day.
We don't exchange with any adults and only do smaller things for the grandparents from the girls. The girls each shop for mom and dad, but again it's not much.
We try to put more of the focus on Jesus - even making a cake on Christmas Day.
Jenna - Mom to Emily (2/02) & Kaitlyn (2/04)
No kids at home this year - no decorations no dinner. I'm not even in the mood for shopping. Except my grandson - I found a radio flyer rocking horse that neighs (and I always that radio flyer was the red wagon). I will get my kids something but It just feels like a chore to wrap. I just feel like taking a year off now that the kids are gone -- well I still have the 6 furbabies which take more time now that the kids are gone.
So nothing for us this year.
So nothing for us this year.
Sounds like an idea! I don't feel that sort of stress though. I give gifts because I love the people I get them for. So I have no worries over what I gave, or if I got something back, etc. And I am a pretty open book on likes and dislikes, so I rarely get a gift I don't like! The stress I do feel though is put on me by myself! Like I decide to make something, then procrastinate, then I get upset with myself...etc. I could deal with not doing that! But it'll never happen!
I love giving and receiving gifts - but this year with dh and no job, it's going to be tight. I already spent more than I should have but some of it was with my unexpected bonus from work. I also used it so we could go to his family's house for Thanksgiving and it was so worth it. He was so happy to see all his brothers and sister.
If he gets the job on Thursday we can breathe - if not, I am seriously going to freak out. But I want to get past Christmas first.
I always decorate at least a little - I skipped it one year and was truly more depressed than normal. So I decided that year I would always decorate. I have a purple pre-lit tree in my office (3 footer) and a smaller one in the lr. I will be buying lights for the windows.
I don't buy for my nephews any longer because; unfortunately, their mother didn't raise them to say thank you or even send a card. All but 1 are over 18 so that's that - the 13 year old will get a gift card if I can swing it. He at least calls to say thank you -
When I lived in WI I picked names of trees they had around town for less fortunate children/families. I usually found at least 1 child under the age of 2 and I bought as many warm clothes as I could for them and a few toys. I don't see that here in MS and really couldn't afford it this year.
But I agree - to each his own - only you can know what works best for you! And there is nothing wrong with that.
If he gets the job on Thursday we can breathe - if not, I am seriously going to freak out. But I want to get past Christmas first.
I always decorate at least a little - I skipped it one year and was truly more depressed than normal. So I decided that year I would always decorate. I have a purple pre-lit tree in my office (3 footer) and a smaller one in the lr. I will be buying lights for the windows.
I don't buy for my nephews any longer because; unfortunately, their mother didn't raise them to say thank you or even send a card. All but 1 are over 18 so that's that - the 13 year old will get a gift card if I can swing it. He at least calls to say thank you -
When I lived in WI I picked names of trees they had around town for less fortunate children/families. I usually found at least 1 child under the age of 2 and I bought as many warm clothes as I could for them and a few toys. I don't see that here in MS and really couldn't afford it this year.
But I agree - to each his own - only you can know what works best for you! And there is nothing wrong with that.
Last edited by TraciL on Sun Dec 07, 2008 5:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.
They are old enough to hear you tell them this. And understand what you are asking.scrapperqueen wrote: Great idea, Gloria. Keep in mind, though, that I have 3 guys who have trouble with this sort of thing. I'd love it if the twins gave each other the gift of not slamming each other for a day, maybe two.
If you were to seriously sit down and say, "LISTEN UP GUYS! This is what I'd like as a gift." would they listen?
Queen Mum - Grammy to Princess Bump (Lisa Giann) and Princess Bean (Gia Bella)
This year I sent out Valentine's Day in Febuary instead of Christmas cards. Everyone said they were surprised and loved the Valentine's cards because they did not get lost in the Christmas shuffle.
Nikki
When you see me with a smile on my face, then you'll know I'm a mental case. ~ Alice Cooper
When you see me with a smile on my face, then you'll know I'm a mental case. ~ Alice Cooper
We've done something similar! We sent out a New Year card in January to let everyone know how the last year went and to hype up our plans for the new year. Through out the year people will ask how those plans are developing which keeps us motivated.NikkiE wrote: This year I sent out Valentine's Day in Febuary instead of Christmas cards. Everyone said they were surprised and loved the Valentine's cards because they did not get lost in the Christmas shuffle.
I've sent out Ground Hog Day cards.NikkiE wrote: This year I sent out Valentine's Day in Febuary instead of Christmas cards. Everyone said they were surprised and loved the Valentine's cards because they did not get lost in the Christmas shuffle.
Queen Mum - Grammy to Princess Bump (Lisa Giann) and Princess Bean (Gia Bella)
No skipping Christmas for me! It's my biggest, bestest holiday all year and I just wouldn't be able to give it up. My fave part is picking out the perfect gift for family members!
We also have a kids-only gift policy, except for my parents and in-laws. That helps, especially when my brother has four!!
Part of cutting out my stress was switching from regular greeting cards to digi picture cards. I used to agonize over those darn things, feeling like I had to write something personal in each one. Now they get a cute pic of Xander, and all I have to do is print them out!
We also have a kids-only gift policy, except for my parents and in-laws. That helps, especially when my brother has four!!
Part of cutting out my stress was switching from regular greeting cards to digi picture cards. I used to agonize over those darn things, feeling like I had to write something personal in each one. Now they get a cute pic of Xander, and all I have to do is print them out!
Cassandra
"I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there." --Herb Caen
"I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there." --Herb Caen
We are down to just gifts within the immediate family; Dh, Dd, Ds, Dd, and I then something for my Dad because he gets us something. I no longer exchange with my siblings, nor my kids with their cousins. Maybe we will do a kid name draw if we ever get together at the same time again. Sometimes we participate in teh name-draw exchange on Dh's side. This year is is supposed to be "white elephant" not sure how that's gonna go...
~
We did cut back a lot on teh kids's gifts this year. But I don't know what to do about 'stocking stuffers,' Santa stuffs the stockings. So, what in the heck can I put in them! grrrrrr.
~
We did cut back a lot on teh kids's gifts this year. But I don't know what to do about 'stocking stuffers,' Santa stuffs the stockings. So, what in the heck can I put in them! grrrrrr.
Jean
"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world; indeed it is the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
funny goat stories: http://www.homesteadingtoday.com/showth ... gest+thing
"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world; indeed it is the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
funny goat stories: http://www.homesteadingtoday.com/showth ... gest+thing
Congratulations! I aspire to that!
We are totally cutting back this year. In my family (dh's is way smaller so it's not an issue) we're doing a gift exchange name draw among the adults. Instead of all getting each other stuff we dont' need, we can focus on one nice gift for someone. Kids excluded though!
And dh and I are not exchanging gifts this year. It is too much like buying ourselves stuff and now we need to focus on the kids.
I too am so glad! I hate people getting me stuff because they think they should and ending up with a bunch of odd bits. (Although I am a remorseless regifter, I have no clutter, and Santa's Workshop loves me. It's a win win! )
Good for you for freeing yourselves from the corporate driven consumerism vortex that December has become and getting back to what the holidays are really about - family, friends and food!!
We are totally cutting back this year. In my family (dh's is way smaller so it's not an issue) we're doing a gift exchange name draw among the adults. Instead of all getting each other stuff we dont' need, we can focus on one nice gift for someone. Kids excluded though!
And dh and I are not exchanging gifts this year. It is too much like buying ourselves stuff and now we need to focus on the kids.
I too am so glad! I hate people getting me stuff because they think they should and ending up with a bunch of odd bits. (Although I am a remorseless regifter, I have no clutter, and Santa's Workshop loves me. It's a win win! )
Good for you for freeing yourselves from the corporate driven consumerism vortex that December has become and getting back to what the holidays are really about - family, friends and food!!
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