Many read the jokes, but unfortunately, few contributed any new jokes to the thread to keep it going, so that is why it died.

I was one of the people who put jokes in the last joke thread but I was unable to participate in the forums as I have been working away from home a lot and did not have great Internet access.

However, here is another joke for you - if people want more then let me know.

100% PROVEN Successful Pick-Up Lines For Classy Guys

1. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.
2. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
3. I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
4. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
5. Are those real?
6. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
7. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
8. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
9. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
10. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
11. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
12. If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
13. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.

I never like having lists with 13 items. There was a 14th but as this is a family place, I decided to remove it.

A motorist pulls up to the gas pumps and says "fill it up, please". The
Attendant notices that the front and back seats of the car are occupied
by penguins.

"Hey Buddy" says the attendant to the driver, "These birds can't be
happy like this...they're wild animals, you should take them to a zoo or
something.."
The motorist agrees to do so.

The next day the guy drives into the filling station and once more the
attendant sees the penguins installed in the front and back seats, and
they are all wearing sunglasses and holding towels...

"What's this?" he says to the driver, "I thought you agreed to take
these birds to the zoo?"

The driver says "I did...and they had such a great time that today I'm
taking them to the beach."

What's white and can't climb trees?















A fridge

Well, it's clean! What more do you want

A father asked his 10 year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees.

"I don't want to know!" the child said, bursting into tears.

"Promise me you won't tell me."

Confused, the father asked what was wrong.

"Oh dad," the boy sobbed, "when I was 6 I got the there's no Santa speech. At 7, I got the there's no Easter Bunny speech. When I Was 8, you hit me with the there's no Tooth Fairy' speech. If you tell me that grown-ups don't really have sex, I'll have nothing left to live for.