ACOT Message Board

After 10 years of love, friendship, pain, hurt, sorrow, infidelity, and violence, I am now officially divorced. The papers went through on February 14th, Valentines Day, so that was hard for me. Parts of me still miss him and love him, but I am in therapy and groups, and I see a Dr too who are all helping me to get through this trying time in my life. My girls are having a hard time too. Their father hardly ever calls them so they cry to me saying that they don't think daddy loves them. They are scared to go with him alone. I do have sole legal and sole physical custody with visitations as agreed upon by both parties. So if I don't agree, he wont get to see. I had offered for him to meet us at a McD's so he can hang out with them for a few hours and I don't even have to sit with them, but he keeps saying no, that he has to still buy them xmas presents, and Brielle's bday presents!!! It almost March!! Well, it took a lot longer than I had wanted it to take, but it's over now and I can finally relax and do what I enjoy doing, and that is making cute fun stuff for my Shoppe!! Either freebies, or $1 deals... You'll see! It will be funtastic!! Thanks for reading and sticking by my rough patch. I've climbed out of that hole and am now starting to move forward.
My Positive affirmation: I, Jeanelle, am worthy of love. I deserve love! I deserve love with a person who can appreciate me for who I am, not what I can do for them.

(((((BIG HUGS))))) to you for being brave enough and strong enough to do what is best for you and your kids!
And I love the positive affirmation you have posted! You are an amazing woman Jeanelle, don't lose sight of that fact!

((Hugs)) to you sweetie! I'm happy for you that you are now in a much better place in your life!

Good for you, Jeanelle!! I am happy to see you finally moving on and wish you the best with your fresh start!

Congrats on getting thru that!! I am so sad for your girls. I have seen this way too many times , here with cherry friends and my friends in my state. It sucks he has to be that way!

(((HUGS))) I hope you can find the strength and excitement in your new beginning!

I am so sorry that you have had to go through all this pain and trouble. And your girls, too. And it probably hasn't been much fun for him either, although I am sure he needed to see some grief! He may be the biggest heel ever (and I have no doubt that he did not behave well), but the girls do not need to know all that. I hope you get them some help, too. Maybe a form of divorce recovery for kids. I don't know if that even exist, but it should. The kids suffer so much! And it is not fair. I am glad that you are able to get help with support groups and the doctor. You are hurting and need the help. I remember when my mom was divorced. Even though it was a step-father, I though he loved us. And it hurt! Then he would come get our brother, his son and not us. That hurt more. My point is is that surely they are hurting. You can help them. Divorce is never easy. I will pray for you and your troubles. We are here.

Been there, and I feel for you. My kids' dad doesn't have much involvement in their lives either, and I spent a lot of time answering "Mommy, why doesn't Daddy come to see us?" with "I don't know honey, I don't understand it either, you'll have to ask your dad." I refused to bad mouth him to them, but I also refused to make excuses for him. I told them the truth...I didn't understand how he could just walk away either.


The day my divorce was finalized was a burden lifted and a little overwhelming at the same time....knowing this was it, I'm on my own. Well, we've done well, and they are thriving, and after being convinced I would never marry again (after all, who would want a woman with six kids? was the way i saw it)....I actually remarried last Friday. He is an awesome man, he treats me like a princess, and I have learned again how to share my life. There IS someone out there who can appreciate you for you, but take your time in finding him.... and enjoy finding yourself and your new relationship wtih your kids.



Hugs and congrats at the same time!

Ayla wrote:Been there, and I feel for you. My kids' dad doesn't have much involvement in their lives either, and I spent a lot of time answering "Mommy, why doesn't Daddy come to see us?" with "I don't know honey, I don't understand it either, you'll have to ask your dad." I refused to bad mouth him to them, but I also refused to make excuses for him. I told them the truth...I didn't understand how he could just walk away either.


The day my divorce was finalized was a burden lifted and a little overwhelming at the same time....knowing this was it, I'm on my own. Well, we've done well, and they are thriving, and after being convinced I would never marry again (after all, who would want a woman with six kids? was the way i saw it)....I actually remarried last Friday. He is an awesome man, he treats me like a princess, and I have learned again how to share my life. There IS someone out there who can appreciate you for you, but take your time in finding him.... and enjoy finding yourself and your new relationship wtih your kids.



Hugs and congrats at the same time!

Oh, Nancy. You said it so well. I love you. (Well, I do!) But hugs and prayers for this situation for Jeanelle.

OMgosh Jeannelle, {{HUGS}} to you! I got goose bumps reading your post. I'm sure there will be lots of adjustments to make, but you'll do fine, remember you always have us Cherries and your wonderful work!

Nancy had great advice, and I agree to just be honest with your girls and not bad mouth to them about their dad. You've been through alot, and now that it's final, you can start back on to a new positive road!

good luck on your new journey Jeanelle!

(((HUGS))) For being strong enough to stand up and get away from it and from getting your children away from it, too. I'm sorry you had to put up with this for so long. I won't say it will be easy from here on out, but at least you won't have his baggage to put up with.

(((HUGS))) to you for being strong and I'm sorry you had to go thru all of that. My heart aches for your kids. But after everything you have gone thru, ending a marriage was for the best.

Lots of hugs to you; been there (my divorce in 1978 was on February 13th); you will get through this. My ex is now a good friend and a good father and a wonderful grandfather! Maybe the years will mellow yours.

Good luck; wishing you a bright future!

((Hugs)))) and I hope things get better for your kids. I love your positive affirmation. Its soooo true!

(Hugs.) I'm glad that you did what you had to do. Great to look forward and focus on the wonderful things in your life - kids, creativity, etc. I'm looking forward to seeing your new designs!

I am so sorry that you and your children are going through such a difficult time. I will keep all of you in my prayers. This will be a better year for all of you.

glad to hear you are finally able to start this new chapter in your life. Hugs.

big {{{HUGS}}} sweetie!!!

Jeanelle, I DO wish you the best. I have been divorced for 2 years now. I went through a lot....and never brought up the "mess" on the boards. I can empathize with you...and totally applaud you for your positive affirmation. There will be days that are harder than others. Just take one day at a time. HUGS!