ACOT Message Board

If you received an e-mail, from an old high school boyfriend that you haven't seen in 17 years ... what would you do?  Do you think it's okay to "Keep in Touch"???

Love to hear your thoughts ... I am very open minded.


UPDATE:

So, tonight I told my husband about the note from the old boyfriend.  He said he didn't have a problem with us keeping touch. 

He said "There's a reason he's your ex ... you ended that years ago."  I shared the note with him.

Now I feel okay with corresponding with my old friend.

Thanks everyone for your input!

 sure whats an email hurt

 depends on how you left things?  if it was on good terms then sure, it would be good to see him I'm sure.  I would be curious at least to know how he was doing and what he looked like.  I know there is one (not from high school) that I would love to be able to find again!

depends on the old boyfriend.... I have a couple that I would email back and a couple that I would see where they are located and if in my area.... hide!

In my case I have no desire to be in any contact with any old boyfriends so I would ignore the email or just tell them so. 

If I actually dated a decent guy back then, the first thing I would do is see how my dh felt about it. If he was cool with it, then why not?

I don't think it's a problem keeping in touch, as long as everyone knows where they stand. Most of my ex-boyfriends I would avoid like the plague, but there is one that I wish I could get back in touch with. It's hard on the spouses, I think, but at least for me with a couple of my old boyfriends, there was a lot of friendship there too. That's the part I miss.

DN in MN wrote:depends on the old boyfriend.... I have a couple that I would email back and a couple that I would see where they are located and if in my area.... hide!

DITTO!  LOL  How did he get your email address? 

If you're married, is your DH the jealous type? 

 My husband is not the jealous type ... he met him 17 years ago ... we've been married for 19 years. 

How he got ahold of my e-mail address ..... Classmates.com 

 Most of mine I would delete after I stopped laughing my butt off.  LOL.  Just not something I want to do but if you are comfy with it go for it.

 I have kept in touch with one of my ex-boyfriends. We go through stages sometimes we are talking a lot to each other and sometimes we go through  months were we do not talk.

I am just really open about it with my husband. (and was with my ex-husband as well.)

This ex-boyfriend and I went out for 5 years.  (2 years HS and 3 in college). Then he got a really fantastic job in Texas. I had planned to move out there to Texas after I finished that year in college, but we grew apart as boy/girlfriend. So we went our separate ways but remained friends.

We might have remained friends though because our famliles were really close though. My grandma was best friends most of her life with his aunt. My grandma, his aunt lived in NJ. So did the ex, he moved to Ca to go to Stanford and my grandama and his aunt set him and I up.

So I say sure it is okay. Just be open and honest about it with your husband.

 Yeah I'd want to know what's up.   Having said that I would make sure dh was okay with it.

 Most I dont mind, but my ex fiance no thanks. I broke it off, and he emailed me for a couple years. I told him to stop, I was married with a family go away! LOL. I think its up to you and how you feel. Trust your gut.

we ended things on good terms ~ I went off to college and it just wasn't working out. 

I suppose, as life goes on, we wonder ... what ever happened to so and so ... he speaks highly of his wife and family ~ so it's all good there and he truly was a good guy.

But he did say for me to "stop into his office sometime"  LOL  that part makes me go ... hmmmm  LOL !!!    Sure Hubby and I will be right over .... lmao

Am I curious what he looks like .. heck yeah ... he was a good lookin' guy, in my opinion ... "back in the day" ... is he bald & ugly now .... I'd love to be a fly on the wall and peak .... LOL   

 

 I think there's no harm in keeping in touch. I'd just make sure Pat knows so that way if he ever found out he wouldn't think that you were trying to hide anything. It'd be kind of neat to see where life took him and what he's been up to for that last few years.

 I think it's kinda a to each their own situation. For me, I can still pretty much talk to all my ex's. We ended on pretty good terms. Actually my ex from when I was 15 is to this day one of my best friends. Much better as friends than dating, I can tell you that! hahaha! My current BF knows that Is till talk to a couple of the ex's, and he's ok with it. But he wouldn't let me go off alone with them I'm sure (well other than the best friend anyway).

So I'd say, go ahead, keep in touch, make sure the hubby knows about it, and I would prob stay away from a visit to the office. That could make a few people uncomfortable/ But perhaps a double date for a dinner so that everyone can get to know each toher again.

 why not?
I like the reply "go with your gut."

 I'll keep you posted as to what my husband has to say ... I just received his note this morning .... I'll share it with him tonight. 

For the record ... I won't be going to his office ... I actually thought that was sorta funny!  He truly is harmless ... well, the guy I once knew was.

 Some were just goofy high school guys.

One is my ex-husband and we have a daughter together so I have to see him -

Then there are a couple that I have remained friends with over the years, one that I stay in fairly constant contact. I even named my youngest ds after him.

 Sure, why not? It's just an email.  Unless there was some bad blood between ya.

 UPDATE:

So, tonight I told my husband about the note from the old boyfriend.  He said he didn't have a problem with us keeping touch. 

He said "There's a reason he's your ex ... you ended that years ago."  I shared the note with him.

Now I feel okay with corresponding with my old friend.

Thanks everyone for your input!